Wednesday, July 9, 2008

NOT a motivation

I would like to take a break from my motivations (of which there are many more to come) to tell what my motivations are not.

I've been following this blog for awhile. This girl's been able to maintain her weight for quite a while and I find that inspiring. Plus, she puts out some pretty wicked recipes. So, I like to read her blog. A small drama has gone on there the last little while and though I really don't want to get involved in it...I want to clear the air for myself.

I am not losing weight (and now trying to maintain it) because I think it will make me a happier person. I do not think my personal self worth and value will be any higher. I do not think my husband will love me more. I do not think my children will love me more. I do not think my friends will like me more. I am not desperate to get into a certain pant size. I am not obsessed with someone else's 'idea' of thin. My good days and bad days do not revolve around the number on the scale. Just because I'm monitoring how much I eat and care about how many calories are in foods doesn't mean that's all there is to my life.

Basically, just because I'm losing weight and trying to improve my health does not mean that I am a desperate person longing to be loved. Nor am I someone to feel sorry for (unless you want to feel sorry for me and my trials with Finny...but even then).

I think this drama causing girl is trying to make herself feel better about her weight by saying it's okay because she loves herself and accepts herself as she is. That's fine, but to insinuate that I don't love and accept myself just because I am trying to lose weight, is bunk.

But you didn't think that of me, did you?

3 comments:

  1. wow- good on you!!!!

    drama is not so much fun...i'm not going to get invovled...but cheers to you

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  2. Hm... so true and such a good reminder to be happy at every stage. I'm terrible for feeling down when I feel fat and feeling happy when I feel thin. Not a good pattern. Thanks for posting this.

    p.s. I dreamed the other night that you came over and we had a great old visit and I just think that would be so great. Maybe one day, eh? :o)

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  3. So, I read the link and been thinking about it all morning. As an overweight woman I think that you should feel different when you lose weight. It is not about hating or loving your body it is about seeing what you have acomplished. It is about seeing how you have been successful at balance in your life. I am down on my self as an over weight person because I have failed at sticking with regular exercise and failed at finding balance with food. You should be proud of your accomplishments Amanda, you have found balance in your body heres to hoping I keep striving for that.

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