Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Still here

The funny thing about personal blogging is figuring out how much to share. How much do I want to tell people about what's going on in my life? It's much easier to write a book review than tell you that I sometimes feel like I'm losing my grip.

It's not all as bad as that, but I'm missing the control I used to have over my eating. I'm also missing the positive effects of that control. And I miss my old pants. It's not so much about my weight and more about, well, the control.

Also? I miss wanting to eat well.

I'm recovering from a case of shingles. It was great fun. I'm lucky that I didn't experience the pain that I was told I would. My doctor prescribed me Tylenol 3's and I haven't had to use one (yet...knock on wood). Let me tell you, though, I was itchy, itchy, itchy. It was awful. It's not lasting as long as I was told it could. But then, I'm pretty young and it's easier to bounce back, I suppose, in your 30's from something like that. Plus, Brian took some extra time off work, so that helped.

I'm told this is usually caused by stress. I'm not sure, really, why I'm so stressed. I mean, I do...but I keep thinking that things could be (and have been) so much worse. I assure you that the effects of said stress are very real. Even as the shingles are disappearing, I'm still not sleeping well or handling everyday life like a feel I should be. And I'm gaining weight.

So, that's where I'm at right now. Still here and maybe a little bit worse for wear...but plugging on. I'm going to try to stop eating in the evenings...I'm hoping that will help with the sleeping at night. I said I was going to last night...but that didn't happen, so I'll try again tonight. Me and my peppermint tea...hopefully that'll help me sleep. More rest should mean a healthier me.

I'll let you know how it goes.


  1. i am saying a prayer for you right now!!!

    i'm sorry that you have been feeling bad. i can't imagine. ugh. glad you are on the mend.

    you CAN get your eating under control... you HAVE to!

    I have been spending some time thinking about what made me join WW in the first place. mostly i wanted to learn how to eat healthy so that i could be an example for my family...especially my daughter. i didn't want her to have to join WW one day because i didn't model a healthy lifestyle. anyway, all that to say.... maybe focus on why you started this journey in the first place. i am trying to be thankful for how far i have come!

    okay, well i think i just wrote a post rather than a comment! glad to hear from you my friend... i have been missing you!!!

  2. ah honey- I'm so sorry ... but ya, stress does nasty things. My left eye has started twitching... a LOT. And headaches. And nightmares.

    go here- http://blueeyedgrasses.blogspot.com/2009/03/and-we-jump-right-in.html

    guess who ? :)