Oh ya...this was a weight loss blog

I started this blog as a weight loss blog.  Over time, it's morphed into more about my everyday life and my struggles in parenting.  But really, my struggle with my weight is an everyday issue too.  Being that weight has always been an issue for me...for as long as I can remember...okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration...I have fleeting memories of being 4.  My weight began to start to be an issue when I was 7.

It's tiresome, but that's me and that's my life.  I have two choices...to give in and stop trying and accept myself as plus-sized woman (because that's where I'll get back to if I don't put effort into it) or keep trying.

And since I'm not willing to throw all my hard work away...I guess I'll start trying again.

Today, when I stepped on the scale, it read 190.6 lbs.  That's about 22 lbs higher than my very lowest weight 15 months ago.  Now, please know that it's not really about the number for me.  Of course I'd love to say that I'm, oh say, 140 lbs.  But 190.6 to me, isn't really that bad.  It's lower than I've been most of my life.  And really, a 22 lb gain isn't that bad if I do something about it.  Now.

However, though that number looks low to me compared to what I've gained and lost in the past...22 lbs has in fact seemed to affect my overall well being.  I feel pretty crappy and I have been feeling that way for a while.   It's not just that I have a big roll over my belt or that I can't do up my small pants.  No, physically, I don't feel as well as I did when my weight was lower.  (I won't go into the details right now)

And that disturbs me.

And means that I really must do something about it.

So between that and the fact that my husband and I are going on a little get away that will require the wearing of a bathing suit in 6 weeks (gack!)...it is time to get serious because I do NOT want to have to buy a new bathing suit right now.  And I'm also tired of feeling as crappy as I am.

Please bear with me over the next while as I rededicate myself to being more careful about what I stuff in my mouth.  I may obsess a little bit here over the coming weeks, but I found in the past this to be a really good place to stay accountable.

Here I go...