Monday, April 21, 2008

Weighing in...

I'm back! I'll write another post about my trip to the city and Finny's MRI. But I just wanted to post a quick one about my weigh in this morning. Up 2.1 lbs. I'll admit it...I didn't count all weekend. And I ate licorice all weekend. I even thought I'm might be sick on Saturday night due to the excessive candy intake. Silly lady that I am.

I remember when I was in college. I felt like I'd changed so much after a semester or two. I didn't see my family much because school was pretty far from home. I'd go home expecting everyone to see how much I'd changed. How mature I'd become and all that stuff. You know, being so grown up now and all. I saw myself differently, but my family still saw me as the same old Amanda. And so, in many ways, I reverted back to my pre-college self when I was home. I was thinking about it last night. I have changed a lot in the past 10 months or so as I've worked on losing this weight. These changes are ones that I'm trying to internalize and no longer be the girl who eats licorice until she's sick or doesn't think about the caloric consequences to the food I shove in my mouth. I think that change comes a lot with how I see myself. I'm still learning to see myself in a new way, a skinny way I guess you could say. However, when I'm with my sister, since our relationship has so many food related memories, I tend to revert back to my old ways. Mmmmm. Licorice. One of my very biggest weaknesses. And she makes the BEST cookies. I loves her cookies. She makes them very big. And of course I have to eat at least one whole one...if not two. So, I think that's gonna take some time to change. I know I will change and luckily, I can come back home and get back on track. But, I've yet to stay on track when I go to her house. Maybe next time.

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