Thursday, April 22, 2010

My Life in Weight

I thought that since I have some new friends that are doing the weight loss thing (thanks UBP '10) and since I'm just starting fresh back with Weight Watchers, I would write a quick rundown of my relationship with my weight.  Because, my friends, it hasn't been pretty!

And so, I guess it won't be quick either.  But let's try the quick version anyways.

I've never not been overweight.  Ever.  I was always a "solid" kid.  Athletic perhaps, but solid.  I come from a big boned family (I'm not joking, we really do have big frames) and there's not one woman that I'm related to that doesn't struggle with her weight.  I tell you that not as an excuse, but it's part of my story.

Jr. High is the first time I couldn't wear clothes in the "normal" section.  My weight has averaged around 220 lbs ever since.  At 5'8", that puts me in the low end of the plus sized clothes.  I've gotten down to the regular sized clothes three times in my adult life.  Once in Grade 12, when I got to just under plus size.  Once in my first year of marriage when I made it down to about 170.  And now.  My pregnancies saw me up in the 250 - 270 range, depending on which one it was.

I learned a lot in previous weight loss attempts using Weigh Down (a Christian weight loss program that focuses on listening to your body and finding other ways to fill your need to eat) where I lost 60 lbs and South Beach (lower/whole grain carb, Glycemic Index using, food based weight loss) where I lost 40 lbs.  I attribute much of my success with WW's to what I learned on these programs.

When Finleigh was 4 months old, I weighed in at 253 pound.  I was really, really ready to make a change.  That's when I signed up to Weight Watcher's Online.  Going to meetings doesn't work for me because my husband works shift work and finding care for my kids isn't always easy.  Besides, who wants to drag themselves out when it's the dead of winter?  I knew that I wouldn't go to meetings and am just so glad there's an online option.  I gathered an online group of people that encouraged me and... well... lost 85lbs to take me to my very lowest weight, which was 168 pounds.  I was 4 pounds away from officially not being overweight.

4 pounds.

Four.

Pounds.

That was last November.  Almost a year and a half ago.

And now, here I sit.  25 pounds above that.  Not quite plus sized again and starting all over.  I'm in much better shape than I've ever been in my life.  I can run 5K.  I can keep up with my kids.  But I feel like crap a lot of the time and have for about a year now.  My digestive system is rebelling against me.  I don't know if it's falling back into the over eating pattern that I did.  Or gluten.  Or dairy.  Or too much acidy coffee/tea/chocolate/Diet Pepsi.  Or just plain old stress and anxiety, which has become pretty prevalent in my life over the last 4 years or so.  But it's how I've been feeling lately more than my pant size that's got me back on program.

Though of course, I miss my old clothes and body too.

If I'm still feeling like this after I get this weight off, I will start eliminating things again.  My couple month long fast from coffee and diet pepsi didn't help, so I've welcomed them back into my life with stricter limits this time.

So that's my quick as I could make it weight story.  Fun, isn't it?

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